Nerves.

It hit me the other day that we have only a month and a half until Miss Sunshine's palate repair. She is not on a cup yet - she is totally attached to the bottle. I don't know what we are going to do about that. I'm going to really start pushing the sippy so I can maybe get to work on the regular cup they want her on before her surgery. They did tell us not to worry too much about it, we can always syringe feed her if necessary, but I would like to at least try. Especially since I like to have the kids off the bottle by 1 anyways. I guess we will see what happens. I am getting kind of nervous about the surgery now as well. I know it's necessary, and that everything will be fine, but there are still risks. And let's be honest - any time you have to think about your child going through something like this, it's bound to be upsetting. I just hope that I don't fall completely apart while I am alone at the hospital with her the night before. I already know I won't sleep - my mind will probably be racing non-stop, and Daddy Mac won't be there to keep me sane since only one parent can stay. I don't know how late they will let him be there, but he will certainly be there until the last possible second, I am sure. I wish I had a way to be better prepared for all of this. I can only hope that this will be the only surgery she needs and that she won't develop a fistula or any other complications.